My Favorite Lists

Gene sends this list of common sense advice:

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of  me, for I  may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either. Just leave me the hell alone.

2. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

3. It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.

4. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

5. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

6. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

7. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

8. Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

9. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

10. Duct tape is like the force; it has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

11. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away, and you have their shoes.

12. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

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