My Favorite Lists
Jane sent this list of product warnings. I don't know who added the editorial comments.
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap (and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's just a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure???)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (Which states offer licenses to 5 year olds?)
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children. (Shishkabob anyone?)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious?)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (Really???)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (I'm glad they cleared that up...)
On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals. (What the ...?)
On a child's superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (That's right, LSD sold separately!)